Customer Service Fail: Lock it up and throw away the key

I had a pretty funny phone call yesterday.  This lady calls and says that she has two laptops in her office that are locked to a desk.

“Physically locked to the desk?” I asked, incredulous.

“Yes.  And they are being replaced tomorrow and we don’t have the keys.”

This is wrong in so many ways I don’t even know where to begin.  I guess the first thing would be:  if the laptops aren’t supposed to be moved then why weren’t desktops used instead?  The second things is why on Earth would you lose the freaking key?  And the third is why would you lock a laptop to a piece of furniture in the first place?  Questions abound, but answers not found.

I very politely had to tell the lady that she failed.  They put the lock on there so it was their responsibility to get it off.